Ulterior Blogging Motives

I promise you I'm not bipolar although you are probably going to think I'm lying by the time I'm done writing this post. As you know, I like getting on here and just having fun. Maybe I like having too much fun. Nah, that's impossible really.

At the moment though I'm feeling pretty serious. And when I feel serious I tend to just want to get on here and write whatever comes into my head.

Adam and I are doing well although we haven't exactly recovered from him being gone. There's been just one spanking and some light, playful swatting here and there. I'm ready for the big one but by the time he gets home every night and I get home and we do the things that need done... well we're just too tired. We talk about it all the time. We just don't have any energy for much.

He's still putting in long hours wrapping up that project from a couple weeks ago. His boss has told him he's to take Friday off and if he sees him at work that day he'll personally remove him from the property. That made Adam's day. His last boss would say things like "We need you here. You can't take a day off." This job is so much better. The best part is that I don't think Adam really WANTS to take time off cuz he loves what he does.

But I've been thinking.... I don't ever want to "top from the bottom" but I'm about ready to say... to just come out and tell him "I need spanked and I need it hard and if you stop before I'm in tears then I am going to spank YOU." Somehow that threat would probably light the exact fire under him needed to accomplish that BUT that's what I don't want to do. I want HIM to take the initiative here. But I'm afraid it's not going to happen.... and besides, I've never been spanked to tears.

Ah, but when he reads this post....

Elis and I had a brief email conversation about this very topic and how we want our men to take charge, spank us hard... and often... well that's what I think she was implying anyhow. (Uh - oh Elis, does Nick read my blog?) It was one of those emails where we were at work. She often talks in code in those emails and leaves it to me to figure out what she means. It's not too difficult though to figure out what she means when she uses terminology such as "our sport."

A sport, is it? LOL I suppose it is at times.

Maybe some role playing would help me. We've never tried any of that sort of thing. I would NEVER do the school girl thing. That's just too creepy for me. And the cheerleader thing? Well, um... I'm not the type. Let's just leave it at that.

But maybe when Adam comes home tonight I will play the part of the ditsy, lazy secretary who didn't get the memo typed informing everyone of tomorrow's meeting. He'd have to spank me then, right? And I think I could pull that part off better than being a cheerleader. We'll leave that to the real pros.

Hmmmmm.....

Or maybe when *I* come home to *him* Friday after his day off, I could be the hooker telling her pimp that she didn't turn as many tricks as she was ordered to.

Oh geeze.

I can't tell him that. He'd hyperventilate.

Forget the hooker.

Okay, think Eva, think....

I could be the Tupperware lady showing up for the party and his wife isn't there because she forgot and one thing leads to another....

... or... or... or.....

I COULD meet him at the door naked sometime and tell him I am not at all interested in buying whatever it is he's selling... or ~ better yet ~ that I AM interested... and invite him in.

Or how about this... I could be the maid who spills his drink (ginger ale is his beverage of choice ~ honest) all over him.

See the thing is, I'm not very good at making him angry enough to want to punish me. Yet at the same time I crave that type of spanking. I don't want to be intentionally bratty but I want a brat's spanking. He likes the sexy erotic type spankings. And so do I however I think ~ in his mind ~ the erotic stuff is okay but a brat's spanking probably would feel like abuse to him even though he knows it's what I want/need/crave.

Yeah, yeah I already hear some of you saying to be careful what I wish for however like Elis said to me earlier when I told her that: "I am throwing caution to the wind and wishing with all my heart!"

So what's my point?

My point, dear reader, is that Adam reads my blog and this is the best way I know to tell him I want more than what I think he thinks I can handle.