This past weekend, Adam and I found ourselves on a mini-trip. We weren't traveling quite as far from home as we did this past August. It was however long enough to have some good conversations. Adam said more about our lifestyle than he ever has in the past.In fact it was enough that I think I can stretch three posts out of it.
The first thing he talked about that intrigued me was the idea of what if someone, anyone, perhaps a man like Cassie's Tom or Paul had pulled him aside BEFORE we were married and shared this idea of spanking with him - how would our lives be different?
Hmmmm... there's no denying it. Many things might have been different.
He says now that he wishes he'd spanked me on our wedding night.
Excuse me?
I'd forgotten. I'd been a brat earlier that day. In my defense I was young, very young. And I probably was scared to death. That was still no excuse for what happened.
I got pissed over the things they wrote on his car. I mean I expected them to write "Just Married" and to draw pictures of wedding bells and stuff. Oh, no... I got "sucker" written on the spare tire. I got "She got him today but he'll get her tonight" written on the side of the car.
Sheesh. How embarrassing. Did people really know we'd be having sex that night? I couldn't care less now but then? Oh, the humiliation.
So I was pissed. And as we left the reception I pitched a fit over having to wash the car before we could even leave town. He didn't know what to do... or say. As we changed our clothes at his parents house I told him to take me back to MY place... that WE were done.
I was scared more than I was pissed.
Anyhow, he says that if he'd put me over his knee right then and there it would have set an entirely different tone for the power struggle we endured over the next twenty years. I can't deny it. I' know he's right.
I think it kind of saddens him to realize how things could have been different all along.
But he didn't know.
We didn't know.
And the car? We never did wipe "sucker" from the spare tire in the trunk. Wonder what the guy who bought it thought?
But no one was going to pull him aside and talk to him about this any more than what he's going to pull a younger guy aside NOW and talk to him. It's a real shame this society doesn't talk more.
They couldn't tell us. We can't tell them.
Pity, that is.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cartoon found at http://www.smug.com
I have given this a lot of thought. I can't wait to see what else you have to say and then I'll weigh in too.
ReplyDeletePK
Hindsight is a wonderful thing, Eva. I always thought my mother told me too much, too soon. Now, I think she knew what she was doing!
ReplyDeleteYes, we don't communicate enough - but thank goodness we blog these days. :)
Hugs
Sky
You're right, Eva, our society doesn't talk enough these days.
ReplyDeleteMy brat and I have been together nearly ten years and by god has she needed spanking in the past, but we've only just started this year.
It's not so much wasted time as an opportunity missed, but that's done and dusted now.
I think I might try and redress this imbalance a little, and take each of my two daughters' eventual boyfriends aside for a little chat.
The subject might not be about him spanking her, though...
A spanking on your wedding night... good idea. Spankings while you were dating... better idea. Looking forward to the next two installments!
ReplyDelete:)
~Todd & Suzy
This is really sad, and since I'm pmsing, it made me cry! Darn those hormones.
ReplyDeleteAs much as I wish I had known about this whole spanking thing back then, I wasn't ready back then to accept it. I think everything happens in it's time. It just wasn't time back then, the time is now.
HUGS!
grace
(Not that I've got any experience to go by --) If my husband would've tried to spank me on our wedding night all those years ago, he probably would have flown out the door before he had a chance to land the second swat. I'm with grace, it just wasn't time back then.
ReplyDelete*passes the bottle midol to grace*
Oh yeah -- I can't wait to hear the rest of the story!
ReplyDeleteI'm with Grace and MaggieDear, things happen in their time. Your relationship is just where it needs to be right now. Yes, there's been water under the bridge...instead of looking back in sadness, look ahead in joy. You're right where you are meant to be!!! Bravo!
ReplyDeleteAnd with the internet and all of us singing the joys of our relationships, we're getting the message out, one post at a time! We're making a difference.
**Big Hugs**
♥ CeeCi
Eva,
ReplyDeleteHindsight is always lovely, and good communication is the key to everything sweet !
Spankee away, my dear -- and much enjoyment with Adam ahead !
Sincerely,
Anne Elizabeth
PK~ "Weigh in" any time. You know I value your comments!!
ReplyDeleteSky~ You are right. I would guess that many of us might not have come this far without this world of blogging to read and assure ourselves with.
Master Fitz~ Then what would the subject be about??
Todd & Suzy~ As good as the wedding night idea sounds, I wonder how receptive I would have been? Probably not very.
Grace~ I agree. I probably wasn't ready either. What's with the crying? I didn't think that was a sad post at all. You okay? Hormones dying down yet? You poor thing!!!
Maggie~ LOL Yeah I hear you. I probably would have popped him one in the chops if he'd tried it.. then again, honestly I don't know what I would have done.
Ceeci~ Yup... you are exactly right. Look ahead. History has never served me very well anyhow!! And I like that idea of one post at a time. Inch by inch... step by step. Yep. We're getting there.
AE~ Thanks! And I sure do look forward to the future. Funny thing is that I'm now living the future that I USED to look forward to. Hmmm.... maybe I need to just enjoy now??
Thanks everyone for your comments!!!
Eva
Hey, this is a great story and not sad at all if seen as gratitude for a lesson learned... now is far better than never.
ReplyDeleteBut you guys have missed a really, really extraordinarily fun opportunity to "set the record" straight... ask Adam how he's feel about now giving you the spanking you had coming then...
I know you two don't role-play but this could be something of interest to you both, and one more experience to learn from. What would he have done then if he knew now what he now knows? Have fun! I'll send a pillow along for wishful thinking!
Love ya, babe, even if you ARE warning people to stay away from me!
Tiggr~ Whoa. That is an AWESOME idea. Hmmmm... I wonder what that spanking would be like? Hmmmmm....
ReplyDeleteAnd the only one warned has been Cassie!!! We have to keep a short leash on her!!
Love you too....
Eva
Mel was matron of honour at several weddings, some didn't last long, I've often wondered if a D D lifestyle might have saved them.
ReplyDeleteWho knows, I certainly don't.
Looking forward to the next two episodes Eva.
Warm hugs,
Paul
Thanks Paul~ And from the woman's POV my guess is that more than likely those marriages would have been saved by it. After all, it pretty much saved mine. It really did.
ReplyDeleteEva
I think I would have responded to a spanking 20 years ago, but who knows.
ReplyDeleteI wish sometimes we had known then..but glad we do know now.
That ..."she got him today, but he is going to get her tonight" kind of turns me on! Does that make me weird???
Who cares! Can't wait for Part 2 & 3!
Hugs
Theresa
Theresa~ I'm glad we know now too!!
ReplyDeleteAnd you? Weird? Never!!
Eva
Eva,
ReplyDeleteI was so angry when Tom spanked me the first time before we were married! Had anyone else I knew at that time tried it I would probably shot them or at least their car! (I did that once!) It was Tom who knew what to do and that made all the difference.
Love,
Cassie
Eva,
ReplyDeleteI have a slightly different point of view. Not only can we tell the next generation, we ARE telling them every time we record our experiences in this medium.
For every person who comments in this blog, there are a hundred more who read silently. Some of those people are aided by the stories we share. Thanks to our words, they have an opportunity to learn these things the easy way and without years of waiting.
How's that for a positive spin?
I'm looking forward to part two.
Hugs,
Bonnie
Cassie~ I swear, you ought to sell your story to Hollywood!! It would make an awesome chick flick!!!
ReplyDeleteBonnie~ You are so right. Thanks for reminding me that my shoulda woulda coulda's are actually happening here!! That's too cool!
Eva