In a perfect world none of us would ever have to hide our spanking lives from anyone because in a perfect world we ALL would be either a spankee or a spanker or both. I prefer to always be the spankee. I like the places my mind goes when my bottom is gaining special attention.
Anyhow, I have a curiousity question that I am hoping you all who are reading will answer for me.
Question: Who in your life knows that you are spanked (or do the spanking) other than your partner (obviously) and those here on the internet? Parents? Children? Friends? And did they find out by accident or did y0u tell them? Is there anyone that - should they find out - would cause you to crawl under a rock and hide forever?
Yeah okay so I am a nosy, curious sort. I'm just wondering how others handle the news and how you spankos handle their reactions.
Eva,
ReplyDeleteI believe our grown daughter has it pretty well figured out (though we've never discussed the subject). Other than that, nobody I hope...
Hugs,
Bonnie
Eva,
ReplyDeleteNo one knows! I want it to stay that way. There is probably one close friend that could tell and I could tell my sister and neither of these guys would condemn me but there is no reason to ever tell. A secret is only a secret if you keep it and this is a topic that must remain secret in our socity.
I would be devastated if my kids found out and I would probably be fired if I were found out at work.
I think in a way its like being gay. Only they are now more accepted than spanko's are. Why should anyone care about another's private sex life!!
So thank-you to all my friends on the internet for giving me a safe place to talk, question and vent. You guys are lifesavers!
Elis
Eva-
ReplyDeleteMy four best friends know. It wasn't originally my idea to tell. They were there when Tom spanked me once long ago. We had barely spoken of it over the years until they were here a few weeks ago.
When they brought it up I suddenly had the courage to stand up for the lifestyle. I believe I got the courage from the blogs I read. It felt wonderful! But these are the only people I could possible share with. I would die if the people in my town and my church knew.
Very interesting questions. I too wonder about other's experiences.
Love, Cassie
I think our 20 year old daughter has it figured out... But I live in a very religious, tiny farming community where any kind of kink at all, evern oral, is considered tabu... I couldn't even tell my best friend...
ReplyDeleteBonnie - I have to admit, I'm surprised by your answer. For some reason, I didn't think you'd really care who knew. Wow. So now I have a question... How did you keep it in all those years?
ReplyDeleteElis - I think you're right. Being gay is far more acceptable than this but do you really think you'd lose your job? I mean I could see if you went around advertising it and promoting it but if someone simply found out??
Cassie - I'm with you. I wouldn't want people in town or church knowing for lots of good reasons. I'm still amazed that Tom spanked you in front of your friends!! About what year was that? and was it acceptable?
And finally HF - I can't tell my best friend either. No one knows. Small town here too.
Thanks ladies for your answers!!
Eva-
ReplyDeleteThat happened in the early 70's. It was during the height of women's lib and it was definitely wasn't acceptable to me!!
Cassie
The only person that knows about me and Bossman is an internet friend that I met in a chatroom over 8 years ago. She knows my kink, and I know hers...she and her hubby tried a couple of 3somes.
ReplyDeleteWe've never met in person, but we've talked on the phone and e-mail regularly.
As far as the rest of my world, it's a secret. I really like having the secret, I feel like it's something that only Bossman and I share, but I sometimes wish I could talk it over with my best friend. Blogging is great, but it's hard to have a heart to heart on the internet!
Grace,
ReplyDeleteWe all seem to be pretty much in the same boat on this, huh? Wouldn't it be sad if some of us actually did know each other? For all I know, you could be the lady down the road from me. I know. Not likely but how sad that we can't talk about it.
Eva
Hi....... I've been lurking on a bunch of the blogs for a while now, but wanted to comment on this one. This is going to take a while.
ReplyDeleteI spanked my first girlfriend at the age of 14, and am now 57. All through the years I have been a comfirmed spanko Top. My wife and I played a lot when we were first married, but after the kids came she sort of dropped out.
While living in Denver in the 90's I started a spanking group called THE SCARLET MOONS OF DENVER. It was a support/play group. We ended up with over 500 members, and the meetings sometimes had as many as 60 people attend. A lady friend and I were the hosts and there was always some sort of demo or lecture. My nick is DENVERJO, so there were around 500 people who knew that I am a spanko.
During the same period, another lady friend was getting her PhD in Soc and sexology at CU Boulder. I guest lectured for her for 11 semesters again usuing my DENVERJO idenity. I would bring others...tops/bottoms/switches and D/s Doms and Subs. Her first class had about 20 people, and the last time I did this, she had two sections of about 400 students. And she told me that on the first day of class, one of the first questions always asked was "Are THOSE PEOPLE going to be coming to this class?"
So I have no idea how many students know my face and know I am into the scene.
And now, for the Big Bomb........
both my son and daughter know.... they asked my outright when they were 16 and 17. My 22 year old daughter is a Domme and my 21 year old son is a switch.... both into the D/s scene. We talk openly about it including my now ex-wife.
Sorry for running on like this, but I thought you'd like a somewhat different viewpoint.
I can be reached at denverjo@hotmail.com if anyone has any comments.
Hi Denverjo!! And welcome! I hope you'll stop back often. And I do appreciate your input! I think I would probably turn 20 shades of red and deny everything if my kids were to ask!
ReplyDeleteHi!
ReplyDeleteI have my three best friends that know. I think probably their husbands know too, but no- one else knows. My kids are WAY too young to know. I would absolutely die if they or my mom or in-laws knew!
:-) Anonymous -- for now at least.
Hi Anon!! Glad you're here. I'm with you... I would die if kids, etc knew... even friends.... NO one in my real world knows.
ReplyDeleteCome back soon!!