Freakazoid

So let's talk about my missing libido.

I've had a complete loss of sex drive for about a year now. I know I don't have to live like this. I know it shouldn't be like this. It's just that I haven't cared. I mean if you aren't interested, you aren't interested. What's the big deal?

And what's worse is that as time has gone on Adam is not interested either. So what do you have when two people have no interest?

No sex. No spanking.

We haven't even tried anything for three months. THREE MONTHS, people. That's a LONNNNGGGGG time to go without sex.... unless of course no one's interested. It's like going three months without flying a kite... or playing touch football. Those are - for sure - interesting and pleasurable activities but I don't know about you... I mean - REALLY - who cares? I do not miss the fact that I haven't flown a kite in years or played touch football. Sure, it would be fun but it's not something I crave. Ergo, I don't exactly miss it either.

But now there's a problem..... seems that my libido is kicking into gear and I'm starting to miss both sex and spanking. (Down, PK, down - I know this excites you).

Here's an even bigger problem..... or rather problemS.

For one thing, Adam is still not back to normal. He's making progress and is so much better than before. They seem to be honing in on different problems and working toward helping him to feel better. A biggie recently brought to our attention is sleep apnea. The neurologist believes that will be a major factor. He's being fitted for a cpap tomorrow or the next day. Fingers crossed. I hope to see his six week long headache disappear and I hope to see his energy level increase. I know one that happens, his interest will return. He is - after all - a red blooded male.

That's not all though.

Doesn't matter how much the mood might be returning for me it doesn't change the fact that I feel like a freakazoid.

After this most recent surgery I came home with an incision from my breastbone to my pubic bone. I had 75 metal staples. It looked like a zipper running right up the middle of my body. I had two of these in - one coming out from each side of my waist and pinned to this. Then there's the third boob. When my surgeon closed my incision it's left a puffy area right between my boobs looking like I've grown a third one. Oh, and did I mention that my belly button is in the trash? That's what my surgeon told offspring #3 when she asked him about it.

I knew every last one of those things was going to take place. My surgeon told me prior to the fact. See, he's not a plastic surgeon but when he repairs a hernia he likes to close the incision tightly eliminating loose skin. Considering my insurance would NEVER cover the cost of a plastic surgeon I couldn't refuse this free skin elimination. I have no regrets. My size 8 pants are too big. I'm pretty sure I can wear a six now.

So about the freakazoid thing.... shortly after surgery I stood in the shower and cried. It was all just too much. It's not quite as bad now because one of the drains is gone and so are the staples. However there's still one drain, the binder, and the puffy third boob.

Sigh.

Who wants to look at all that? Even once the drain is gone and the binder is shed there will still be that extra hooter, no belly button and a massive scar to look at. Poor Adam. I wouldn't want to be him and don't blame him if he NEVER gets his interest back.

In spite of all that, stay tuned.... I got an idea for a post this morning that I want to write soon. Hopefully I will do that today and post it tomorrow.

~~~oooOOOooo~~~

The cat is out of the bag.....And I can't wait!! Can you imagine PK, Grace, C.c, and myself all in the same state with our men? It's going to be a blast!!!! For obvious privacy reasons we can't tell you exactly when or where but don't worry - you'll be getting all the sordid details one day soon.

~~~oooOOOooo~~~

One more thing before I go.... this past week... when PK and Nick were here.... she got spanked and I saw every swat!!!!!!